I dunno, man, these life changes might be bigger than I anticipated...With all the research and investigation I've been doing, I've actually managed to make food weigh more heavily on my mind. I scan everything I pick up like the Terminator, assessing it for nutritional value and ethical impact.
Furthermore, this whole vegetarian transition is affecting me in unexpected ways. I've always loved animals, but never had an issue with using them for food. Truthfully, I still don't. Maybe it isn't necessary to eat meat anymore, but I don't think it's unnatural either. My main goal was only to reduce my animal product intake. But the more I learn about the livestock industry, the more hopeless it seems that I'll ever bounce back and enjoy the occasional steak and eggs. Did I actually hope to? Well, kind of... I do enjoy some meaty comfort foods. As terrible as the words, "meat pie" sound, the dish itself makes me drool! I also enjoy eating as a social activity, and it's hard to convince a group of drunken people that pepperoni is not essential to a pizza (drunkenly, I agree with them).
I feel like I'm leaving a safety net, and like any stubborn child, I feel emotional and defensive about the whole thing. I've cried a few times. I've been irritable. I feel overwhelmed and confused, and that chili cheese fries from Wendy's would make everything better right now. But in reality, a little dish of synthetic cheese sauce and an ounce of possibly 50 different dead cows will not make my life any easier.
Off to the animal shelter, then the gym, then back to hibernating. -20 weather is ungodly.
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